Healthy Boundaries as an integral Foundation Stone to the Spiritual Solution for PTSD and those who suffer from Past Trauma Memories
i never learned about boundaries ands experiencing events in my childhood caused me to ignore their concept. i lived my life looking for validation from others, wanting to be liked by others, wearing masks, not having any kind of boundary putting up with other peoples behaviors in my drive to be accepted and approved, this in turn led me to treat other peoples boundaries in the same manner. this was brought to a head when i was challenged by a colleague i disliked, today i can smile about and the fact that God works in mysterious ways, using a person i disliked to teach me my hardest lesson yet. but in this episode i suggest we each need to separate our past selves & our future selves from our present day selves. We are only in existence, alive for these 24 hours. what happened in all our yester years happened to younger versions of ourselves and by working on new boundaries, we are able to release these events back to their rightful owners and concentrate on our own lives in these 24 hours right now.
Frankly, my brothers, whatever is true; whatever is noble; whatever is right; whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable — if anything is excellent or praiseworthy -think about such things. whatever you have learned or received or heard from me. or seen in me- put it into practice. [Philippians 4:8]
This is a challenging topic for me, as most of my life i never understood what boundaries were. Due to a past trauma event, that dug a hole in my soul, i had no understanding or belief in the power of boundaries, even that they were a thing. It wasn’t until less than 10 years ago, I was challenged by a colleague over my not having any kind of boundaries, as far as he was concerned. I was furious and affronted that this person should make such an accusation. The fact that I believed he didn't like me as much as I disliked him, led me to treat it for a time as a personal attack, and not God sending a messenger to me to become aware of an area I needed to work on.
Being a young father at this time and needing to teach my own children boundaries, really brought home to me what this Messenger from God had tried to tell me.
If you are in therapy or you have concerned family or friends around you, have them teach you about boundaries and how important they are for daily living.
If you are under financial restraints for any reason, pay a visit to your local pastor; they don't charge, have family therapy training; and their purpose in life is to serve God and their fellowman selflessly.
There is no requirement for you to join a religion or attend a church.
The sole goal is to fill your soul with the Holy Spirit, so you will learn what to truly focus on.
With good healthy boundaries, we can accept ourselves exactly as we are, even if we fall short of the expectations of others.
It’s very important at this stage to know two principles:
We are only alive for these 24 hours and as such when i speak about boundaries i am talking about having a boundary between these 24 hours and all the yesterdays.
Right now as you read this, this is your whole life, when you woke up this morning you started your life again, 24 hours of the immortal life of your soul, we cannot change the past and we might not wake up tomorrow. this means we are only alive, in existence in these 24 hours,[ for me, typing this at 2pm in the afternoon and will retire to my bed by 10pm to sleep, I only have the next 8 hours to truly deal with]
This realization, brings hope the truth that the past is not my concern, its not an event I suffered, rather it is a memory of an event that happened in one of my past lives, but didn’t happen to the me of today, because my life is solely in these 24 hours, of which all I have facing me, is the next 8hours before i go to bed.
The second principle is simply all my my past lives are now Spiritual Entities that I carry as memories, and no man-made solutions, whether, therapy, medication or treatment can.
They can only be treated spiritually with a spiritual solution!
Getting this far, one becomes aware of the true reality of the situation.
There is something truly freeing in understanding we don't have to suffer our past, we can return it to the rightful owners and by following The Teachings of Christ Yeshua, cast out our demons, triggers, nightmares and flashbacks.
When promoting boundaries, it is in relation to separating the present me from all the past versions of me who suffered the trauma events.
Setting out what my life is today & today only for these 24 hours; knowing that this is my life today; enables me to use a practice like The Victory Principle to give my burdens back to their rightful owners so that I can be present in these 24 hours, a part of, rather than a part from.
For too long I allowed the memory of past trauma to push me into a role of victim, but by embracing boundaries and implementing them into my life, whilst respecting those on the other side, especially those past aspects of me, accepting that they can deal with their stuff without my help, I no longer walk the path of victimhood, blame and self doubt.
Today, I have my history, I can talk about it without it ruling me and I can choose today what is acceptable in my life for these 24 hours.
The bible clearly tells us how to cast out our demons: focus on life and living, reject enduring the past or reliving moments from the past. concentrate on all that is good, and your subconscious mind will get the message and believe [ if you push it hard enough] that you are letting go of the past and becoming a new creation.
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation, the old has passed away, behold all things have become new [2 Corinthians 5:17]
That the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. [Romans 8:21]
This is decision making time!
Either how you are treating your trauma memory is working and there is a light at the end of the tunnel that is not an oncoming train, but the path to freedom to live your life, freely today, or it is time to seriously consider embracing the Spiritual Solution that is The Teachings of Christ Yeshua.
The goal is to live these 24 hours only, no more, no less.
There is enough to deal with ,to be challenged by in each 24 hours than to be attempting to fix someone else’s pains and hurts. that just doesn't make sense on any level.